Successful Courtship.. what does it mean?

UCHE ALOZIE
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Courtship is carried out by persons with the intention of knowing each other better in terms of goals, hobbies, likes and dislike, friends and family member’s prelude to marriage. Most of the marriages that fail are courtship failures. A young lady named Faith attested to this fact when she said “My courtship with Kennedy was filled with romantic emotions that I never take my time to study him and ascertain his real person. After a month of marriage I found out bitterly the monster he is made of, he does drugs and beat me silly I could no longer endure all these, hence after first year of our marriage we divorced”

Therefore to avoid the above experience it is vital for singles to have a successful courtship. The following steps will help in this regard.

Be prudent before you court: Developing romantic feelings for someone whom you hardly know invites disaster—even if that one seems appealing. It can lead to a marriage with a person whose emotions and goals are miles apart from yours! It is therefore prudent first to observe that one in a group setting, perhaps while you are enjoying some form of recreation.

Prudence also entails that you ask those who knows him or her very well in order for you to ascertain the person’s personalities and reputation. It is also vital for you to study the person from a distance without getting emotionally involved. By so doing you will see clearly how the person relate with others, you will also discern the persons concerns, goals and aspirations if it aligns with what YOU really want.

The First Dates: Having decided that someone might be a suitable marriage mate for you, approach the person and express a desire to get to know the person better. Assuming there is a positive response, your first date need not be some elaborate affair. Perhaps a lunch or dinner date or even being part of a group date will enable you to become better acquainted so as to decide whether you really want to take the relationship any further. Keeping things somewhat informal helps ease some of the nervousness both might feel initially. By avoiding premature expressions of commitment, you can minimize feelings of rejection, embarrassment or heart break if there is a loss of interest by both or either party.

Irrespective of the type of date arranged, show up on time, neatly and appropriately dressed. Display the skills of a good listener and a conversationalist. Though there are no hard-and-fast rules in such matters, a young man will want to follow local rules of etiquette. These may include opening a door for the young lady or helping her into her seat. A young woman ideally should not expect out of space treatment. As a matter of fact should cooperate modestly with her date’s efforts. By treating each other with mutual respect, a couple can set a pattern for the future.

Is holding hands, kissing, or embracing appropriate, and if so, when? Displays of affection, when performed as genuine expressions of endearment and not selfish passion, can be both clean and appropriate. Logically, such expressions of endearment should be made only when the relationship has reached a point where mutual commitment has developed and marriage seems imminent. By exhibiting

 

 

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